Autism in Women and Girls: Why Coaching Can Be Especially Helpful After Diagnosis
Autism does not look the same for everyone. For many women and girls, autistic traits are subtle, internalised, or masked, often leading to late diagnosis or years of being misunderstood.
By the time a diagnosis is received, many autistic women describe feeling relief, alongside grief, exhaustion, and confusion about identity. This is where post-diagnostic neurodivergent coaching can be particularly supportive.
Why autism is often missed in women and girls
Autism has historically been understood through a narrow lens, based largely on male presentations. As a result, many women and girls learn early to adapt, mask, or compensate.
Common features of autistic female presentations may include:
Strong social motivation but high social exhaustion
Masking or camouflaging autistic traits
Internalised anxiety or emotional overwhelm
Perfectionism or people-pleasing
Difficulties that emerge more clearly in adolescence or adulthood
Being labelled as “anxious”, “sensitive”, or “coping well on the surface”
Because of this, many autistic women reach adulthood without support — often feeling something is “wrong” without understanding why.
Life after diagnosis:
Receiving an autism diagnosis later in life can raise complex questions:
Who am I without masking?
Which struggles are autism, and which are burnout or anxiety?
How do I meet my needs without guilt?
Information alone is rarely enough to answer these questions. Many people need space, reflection, and practical support to integrate their diagnosis into everyday life.
How neurodivergent coaching can help
Neurodivergent coaching offers a structured, strengths-based way to explore life after diagnosis — without framing autism as something to fix.
For autistic women and girls, coaching may support:
Understanding personal autistic traits and needs
Identifying masking patterns and their impact
Developing strategies to manage overwhelm and burnout
Building confidence in communication and boundaries
Navigating work, relationships, and identity transitions
Reconnecting with values, strengths, and self-trust
Coaching is collaborative and future-focused, helping individuals move forward in ways that feel authentic and sustainable.
A neuro-affirming, gender-aware approach
At Lycali, our coaching recognises that autism in women and girls is often shaped by social expectations, pressure to conform, and emotional labour.
We work with individuals to:
reduce shame and self-blame
validate lived experience
develop strategies that fit real life, not stereotypes
support autonomy and self-advocacy
Coaching is adapted for adults, young people, and children aged 14+, with careful consideration of communication style, energy levels, and capacity.
Coaching alongside post-diagnostic support
Neurodivergent coaching often works best as part of a post-diagnostic pathway, alongside psychoeducation or therapeutic support where appropriate.
It can be especially helpful for autistic women and girls who:
were diagnosed later in life
feel exhausted from years of masking
want practical change rather than more explanation
are ready to build a life that works with their neurodivergence
Moving forward after diagnosis
Autism is not something to overcome. It is something to understand, integrate, and celebrate.
Neurodivergent coaching at Lycali supports autistic women, girls, and adults to move forward with clarity, confidence, and self-compassion, building strategies that respect who they are rather than who they were expected to be.